My brother Philip came and gave me flowers on Monday. Then he took me and the boys to the Aquarium in Long Beach. It took my mind off of things for a while. He's so sweet for bringing me flowers. My youngest brother Tommy invited us to go to the beach yesterday. It was fun, there were other little boys there to play with my boys. I went to the mall today, got a few birthday presents for my mom and my sister Kandy. I ran into an old friend that used to work with Kandy over at the bookstore. Now she works at Bath and Body. She was nice enough to send the things I was buying for Kandy from the store to Kandy's house in Ohio. It's less than sending it through the post office. That was really cool. Then the boys started getting antsy and running in the store. So I had to leave. It's fun when people give you dirty looks because you have no control over your children. I love it. Oh well, at least I don't chase them around yelling and cussing at them like some of the people Kandy has encountered by working at the bookstore. Yeah, that's the way to handle it. I guess the reason that I was shopping was to get my mind off of things. It's very theraputic for me. Even with the kids with me. They bring me back from La-La Land into reality. They snap me out of whatever self loathing funk I'm in. I really would rather have them with me, than to be alone right now. I told Bob that I was upstairs doing laundry yesterday, and the boys were downstairs doing God knows what. When I finally came downstairs, I couldn't even see the floor. It was covered with board games. I didn't even have the energy to get mad at them, or yell. I have gone through this with them many times before. Yelling and getting mad does no good. I just helped them clean it up. They were just trying to amuse themselves. I was just happy that they didn't go outside and run down the street, like they usually try to do.